Single, and Ready to Mingle?

Never in my life have I been made so aware of my singleness. I have been in Elk Grove for about a week and I think I have been asked at least 4 times if I was married. But they don't just ask me that. A few of them first asked me if I had any kids. Then they asked me if I was married. Each time they asked if I was married, they would actually look at my left hand for a ring. I don't mind the questions. I just think it is funny.

Yes people, I am single. And I am ok with it.

New Chapter

Oh Wow! It has been awhile... I don't even remember where I left off. I guess I am reminded of a blog that I wrote in November of last year. I was finishing up school and didn't really know what was going to happen in my life, but I had a feeling that God had some big plans in mind. Well, I am happy to tell you all that as I sit here in my new home in Elk Grove, CA, I honestly can tell you that God has some big plans. Monday I start staff training at the local Christian High School where I will be teaching math.

I am floored that way back then, God was working on my heart and preparing me for this transition. I just finished a CRAZY summer at OVS (and not a good kind of crazy) yesterday and had to drive up today. Saying goodbyes this last week were hard, but I feel so blessed to have this new opportunity. I am excited about this new journey and look forward to updating you on this new adventure God has set before me.

Please pray for a smooth transition and courage when meeting new people.

Sometimes We Have To Stop Running...

I don't really consider myself an articulate person. I am barely able to keep this blog up and running with random thoughts and stories from my life, let alone try to articulate the crazy thoughts that go running through my head. But sometimes, just sometimes, I find someone else who articulates my life better than I can... With school ending and my life actually slowing down for the first time... Well... Ever... I find myself alone with my own thoughts... And to be totally honest... I don't like them very much... It is encouraging, however to read that someone else struggles with slowing down too. And I pray that in this slow period of my life, I can start healing and moving forward with what God has planned for my life.

"What happens when you stop running? For me, it's just a time to survey the damage. To say I'm sorry to the people I need to say I'm sorry to. To not distract myself or numb myself with a plan of attack, but rather to pick up the first little pile of ash, the first shards of broken glass and try to clean up a little of the mess I've made.

What happens when you stop running? You start healing. At least that's my hope."

- Donald Miller

Visuals

The older I get, the more I realize how much I like visuals. If I can see or imagine how something looks and works, it makes more sense to me. Even with math stuff, I ask people to send me a picture text in order to help them with little problems because I have to see the problem in order to understand it and explain it.

I realize now how much the same goes in my relationship with Christ. It's hard to be such a visual person and not be able to see and understand everything about Him. So I struggle. But sometimes I come across songs, quotes, or devotionals that paint a picture for me. See, I am a visual person, but I am not a creative person. I don't have a great imagination. I struggle to compare this thing that I can't see to things I can understand. And maybe that's ok. I don't think we can or are supposed to compare God to things we can see and understand because He is so much bigger than all of that. I don't think I (or anyone else for that matter) will ever fully comprehend what this really is. Which sucks. But, for now, I have songs like this that paint a beautiful picture of what this is...

THE MORE I SEEK YOU

The more I seek You

The more I find You

The more I find You

The more I love You

I wanna sit at Your feet

Drink from the cup in Your hand.

Lay back against You and breath,

Hear Your heart beat

This love is so deep

It's more than I can stand

I melt in Your peace, it's overwhelming

DONE!!!!

That's right people! After 6 and a half long years of ups and downs and dropping out and transferring... I finally made it! Today was my last day of college and I couldn't be happier. When my last class was over, I couldn't stop smiling and all I wanted to do was praise God!

Rooftops

by: Jesus Culture

Here I am before you

Falling in love and seeking your truth

Knowing that your perfect grace

Has brought me to this place

Because of you I freely live

My life to you, oh God, I give

So I stand before You God

I lift my voice because you set me free

So I shout out your name from the rooftops I proclaim

That I am Yours, I am yours

All the good You've done for me

I lift up my hand up hand for all to see

You're the only one

Who brings me to my knees

To share this love across the earth

The beauty of Your Holy Word

So I kneel before You God

I lift my hands because you set me free

So I shout out your name from the rooftops I proclaim

That I am Yours, I am Yours

All that I am I place into Your loving hands

And I am Yours, I am Yours

Here I am, I stand with arms wide open

To the one, the Son, the everlasting God

I Heard it through the Grapevine...

Gossip is a funny thing... We all know it's wrong... We all know it is something we need to avoid... So why do we all still get sucked into it? I have realized that there are three different types of Gossipers...

1.) There are those who spread the gossip. These are the ones who hear something (or make it up) and pass it (or a version of it... or what they interpret of it...) on to other people. They might tell a few people or they might tell a bunch of people. They might think that they are "helping" other people out by filling them in on other people's personal information, but really they are just helping themselves by releasing something that was burdening their mind...

2.) Then there are then people who look for the gossip. These are the people who ask others to share what they know (these people and the 1st type get along great!). They may not necessarily share what they know with other people but they go out of their way to find it out.

3.) And finally there are the innocent bystanders. You wouldn't think it, but they are a big part of this gossip problem. These are the people who don't share gossip and don't pursue gossip, but are at the right place at the right time. These are the people who are around when the 1's and 2's are going at it... Sounds innocent enough... but these are the people who just let it happen... They don't say anything to stop it and they don't try and remove themselves from the situation...

Where is this coming from? I'm tired of gossip. And while I know it's unavoidable and it's never going to end, I'm attempting to make a change. Wish me luck...

A Little bit of Crazy

You know those crazy people? The ones that talk out loud, like they are talking to you, but you aren't sure if they are talking to you or not... So you make those faces that are kinda like saying, "Oh yeah?", "Wow, that's interesting...", or "Really?" There's this one crazy guy who comes in and swims every morning. And let's just say, I've gotten really good at these faces...

Divine Appointment

I believe that God is Big. It's hard for me to even wrap my mind around how big He is sometimes. Whenever I start to limit God or doubt how big He is, He seems to always throw people into my path that He uses to bring me back to Him and the His path. A couple of weeks ago, I had one of these Divine Appointments.

Recently I have really been praying a lot about the path I am on (in regards to teaching and what I will be doing after college...). Saturday mornings at camp, I have to open the dinning room at 7:30 to tidy up and get the room ready for breakfast at 8:30. Cleaning the room doesn't always take this long so I usually end up with some downtime to read and drink my coffee in a quiet room. This particular morning, however, we had a family group in and many of the older guests came up for some coffee. One lady in particular came straight over to my table and sat down to chat with me. I remembered her from years past but didn't remember her name or anything like that. We never had a conversation before (that I can remember) and there was no real invitation to join my very quiet table, yet she sat and started chatting away.

She asked me about my life and I shared with her that I am graduating this semester and am planning to teach Math. She got so excited (she even gave me a high five) and shared with me that she is a Science teacher. She told me all about her experiences teaching and gave me really good advice in regards to how long it takes to actually like teaching. She was so reassuring and comforting that I rang the bell late because I wanted to keep talking to her. Our conversation ended almost as quickly as it began, but the wisdom that she shared with me and the encouragement she gave me has lasted for weeks.

It's neat to see how big God is when He puts people in your life at the exact moment you need them... Even if it is only for a moment...

Defeat Me With Your Goodness

I like blogging. I like writing out my thoughts and going back and seeing where I have been and where God is taking me. Better yet, I like reading blogs. I currently have about 50 subscriptions to other people's blogs. Mostly people I know but some I do not know but like reading what they have to say. I wish I could explore more and read more of what people have to say.

I have recently been reading Donald Miller's blog a lot (as you can tell from a couple of my older posts) and was really touched by one of his recent posts. The post itself wasn't terribly profound and no it didn't bring me to tears (as many things often do...), but there was one phrase that just grabbed my attention and made me think. "God, defeat me with Your Goodness!" I am not sure what exactly I like about this phrase. It might just be that I really feel like I have been and continue to be defeated my God's goodness. A couple months ago, I opened myself up to God and His plan for my life and told Him to take control. And lately I have been so overwhelmed by His goodness and His plan that I have felt defeated. Not defeated like I want to give up but defeated like I want Him to pump the breaks a little and slow down a little.

The post is pretty short and I definitely recommend reading it if you have time, but if you don't, I think the last paragraph wraps it all up nicely:

"So here we are, temporary beings, with little to do but navigate our days in truth and humility. Perhaps it not the bigness of our personalities, but our smallness, our selves being defeated that will change the little bit of world God has appointed to us for caretaking. We connect with God when we ask Him to defeat in us all the ways in which He cannot connect, all the untruth and games and manipulation and we come to Him finally saying, okay, I get it, you really are good, defeat in me the lack of faith, let your goodness rid me of the stuff that doesn’t connect with you or the world around me"

Nerd Alert!

DISCLAIMER: I am a nerd... I am well aware... If you don't care for nerdy things... don't read...

Next week I am going to be teaching a couple of classes for our 6th grade Outdoor Ed program. I am really excited because I get to teach about Math in Nature. I wrote the curriculum for it last week and I literally can't stop thinking about it. It's fun to plan something and be so excited about it that you just sort of accept the fact that other people might not think it is as cool as you do. I think seeing Math in Nature is super cool. For example, the Fibonacci Sequence (1, 1, 2, 3, 5, 8, 13, 21, 34, 55...) can be seen everywhere in Nature! Take the family tree of a male Honey Bee:

- A male Honey Bee is produced from the unfertilized egg of a Queen (female that is fed special hormones in order to produce eggs) Bee. Meaning they only have one parent.
- A female Honey Bee is produced from a fertilized egg: i.e. they have a mom and a dad.

So if we trace the family tree of a Male Honey Bee, you get something that looks like the following.
Anyone notice a pattern? If you go up the levels, you will notice that you have 1 Bee, who has 1 parent, who has 2 parents, then 3 parents, then 5 parents... And so on and so forth... It's the Fibonacci sequence people... So Cool!!!

I know I am a nerd... Don't say I didn't warn you!